Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Finished Project!!!

Yesterday I FINALLY got to finish my project!  So proud, so thankful for my patient friend Brianna who sat with me and walked me through every step.  Reassuring me that every mistake was not a "throw it away, I can't do this" mistake.  I love that she believed in me and said I could do it.  So, now on to Halloween clothes, and clothes for my nieces...We'll see how long this lasts.  But I sure love these ragged pumpkin outfits.  Silena...You like?!?  ha!


Wednesday, September 19, 2012

The Blessing!!

This year Jason and I were going to take the majority of our "tax money" and pay off our van.  But, as you know it was crashed!  We looked at a new van with all the bells and whistles.  We justified our wantings with "building our credit back" and then the Lord provided us a van that would have NO CAR PAYMENT.  That sold us.  That made no sunroof/dvd/automatic doors/leather seat/65000 mile car less appealing.  That simple statement...NO CAR PAYMENT.  And we love our new ride!!

A friend from church (who owns a used car lot - Dawson Auto) heard about our crash and told Jason he didn't have any vans but would keep he eyes open for one and Monday (after all our insurance stuff settled) he went to Long Lewis and it was there.  He snagged it for $6000 and sold it to us for what he bought it for.  It was a testimony to us of God's faithfulness but Sonny also said, "Isn't the Lord good!" So it was a testimony of God's goodness to him too!  We were all blessed in the process!


She is affectionately known as Scarlet.  She's not perfect, but she's better than what we did have.  Less miles, newer vehicle, more space, and a lot of love!  We'll just leave it at that. As of today...we are painting the town RED!

And hopefully she will be loved until this one can drive.  HA!!  Maybe not Isaac but DEFINITELY NOAH!

I have to say I love how the Lord provides blessings in the storms of life.  He can turn bad things into really good things.  Thank you Lord for your provisions.  Thanks for loving our family in the little everyday things of life.  Thanks for your protection over me and the babies in our crash.  May this van be another reminder of your faithfulness and blessings!  I just love you Lord!

Monday, September 17, 2012

Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
Prov. 31:31

My grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's 7 years ago (in 2005).  My grandfather has taken care of her and the progression of the disease has been very slow.  She has always been good to take her meds and has pretty much stayed "healthy".  When we would see her she would know (or act like she knew us) she can't tell whose kids are whose but she knows they are hers! 

I thought if Pawpaw had to die before her that having the disease would kind of be a good thing, a blessing to her.  She could forget about the hurt, even if just for a minute.  But watching her grieve has been painful.  And I find myself wishing she could just remember.  Remember he was sick for 3 months, remember she was at his bedside, remember the funeral, remember the burial, remember the cemetery, remember SOMETHING!!  Something that says a new phase is starting, at 81, it's starting.  Here's what makes it hard... She knows something is different and everyday she tries to figure it out.  "Where is Lavon?"  We tell her he died and that shock comes across her face and she begins asking the hard questions.   And as comic relief I will share the funniest question, "Did I kill him?"  She wasn't being funny, but it was a question I didn't think she would ask!  She has asked: Why?  What happened to him? Was I there? He was a good man, why would the Lord take him? 

And now the questions have turned to the house, Where do I live?  Did you close the house down?  Did you lock it up?  Shouldn't I go home?  She breaks my heart when she says, "I never wanted to live this long to be a bother!"  ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!  She is precious!  Not a bother.  I love her, I hate her heart is broken.  I hate that we can't mend the hurt!  I hate that she doesn't know where she is, when she is going home, or what is home to begin with.

I pray that she will enjoy her days with her kids and grandkids and great grandkids.  That somehow she will grasp the change, embrace it, except the love...she is so loved. 

I'm praying for her, my aunt & uncle, and my parents as they decide what the best way to care for her is!  May we all honor her well and bring a small ray of sunshine into her life.  For she has shown so brightly in ours!! 

Friday, September 14, 2012

The Funeral...

Making the most of a bad situation...

We all went to the hospital the day Pawpaw decided to end his treatment. My mom took my grandmother home to her house to rest and then they brought her to my house the next day to spend the night. She was battling a cold this whole time so the day before the funeral she slept all day! I mean ALL DAY LONG! I think she was depressed subconsciously. I let her rest knowing the next day would be long and painful. When we woke her up that day and the question finally came, "Where's Lavon?" she broke down, Mom broke down, I broke down. It was sad. She wept...literally grieved for him. It was so terribly sad. But we had to make the most of a bad situation.

A friend from church owns J.Dawson Salon and she opened her shop up at 7:00 p.m. to do my grandmother's hair for the funeral.  She was a blessing that night!  A true friend and blessing!  She made my grandmother look amazing!  Absolutely amazing!  Not to mention he loved getting her hair washed and fixed at the salon.  Judy let us forget about our worries for a while...we laughed and talked (I snuck away to shoe shop...).  But it made her feel great and look beautiful! 


TADA...She looks amazing!  And I love that she went in her PJs...

After the salon we drove to Huntsville to spend the night at her house so we wouldn't have to wake up so early to get to the funeral.  My mom and I are not morning people!  It was good for her to be home. 

The next morning we woke her up to get ready.  She rolled over and said "I'm not going!"  Oh, that is what we all felt in our hearts.  No one wanted to face this day.  I didn't want to see her hurt, I didn't want to face the reality of his death, I didn't know how she would react, what it was going to do to her.  I was with her...I DIDN'T WANT TO GO EITHER!  Mary felt on the outside what we all felt on the inside.

But everyone got it together and looked so pretty.  It was going to be a long long day!  Here went nothing!

You can seriously tell that my grandfather planned his funeral.  It was done in Pawpaw fashion.  Jason played the piano and sang with my cousins the hymns he had picked out.  Jason spoke and I loved it.  He sets aside the emotion and puts wisdom and clarity to the situation.  He spoke from Luke?!?  About Jesus raising...from the dead.  Where Jesus is...there is NO DEATH!  Praise the Lord.  My cousins also spoke about the life and legacy of Pawpaw.  It was sweet.  Then ... one of my favorite parts was when the preacher said that Lavon wanted the gospel preached and a powerpoint presentation at the funeral.  HILARIOUS.  He said he had never seen one done at a funeral and he wanted to be the first.  Well, he was the first! 

I love this picture! 
Noah's name means COMFORTER.  He wanted to sit beside Mammaw and be sure she was ok...He is the sweetest kid EVER!

The kids found this statue of I think Jesus.  They were fascinated!  They are comic relief to every situation!

I felt somewhat morbid taking pictures at a funeral.  I remember there are a few pictures of my mom's dad's funeral and we thought they were crazy for taking pictures.  But with my grandmother's disease I honestly wish I would have taken more of Lavon's funeral!  I have showed her these and she likes seeing them.  She wants to know she was there and remember but she just can't.

This is my mom's dad...
She looks a lot like him
I never knew him
I wish so badly I did
I also love pictures on tombstones
But then again, I love pictures!

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

It was the best of times...It was the worst of times...

My grandfather has been fighting pulmonary fibrosis for about 3 months now.  He went into the hospital 2 weeks ago and we brought Mammaw to Birmingham for a "vacation".  She stayed with my Aunt and Uncle for a week and then she stayed with us.

If you have read my blog any amount of time you would know I'm in love with my grandmother.  She is an amazing, strong, funny woman.  I was so excited she was going to stay with us.  And we had such a great time with her.  We laughed a lot.  We talked, we hung out, she said she had Chinese for the first time with us, she told us stories, she loved on my kids, she read to them and scratched their backs, they brushed her hair and put her socks on her, they snuggled with her and loved on her.  We sang hymns, she wrote shorthand for me and a special note that I may have dictated but she said it was true (ha).  I tucked her in bed every night and it was beautiful.  A big hug and kiss made everything ok enough for her to rest.  I love her (period).

"Dear Page, You are the greatest grandchild that ever was"

That was the best of times.  Except...she got a cold, and that made me sad for her, then I got a cold, then I was in a wreck, then...we got a call Monday to bring Mammaw up to see PawPaw because he was tired and done fighting.  So, that's what we did.  With family gathered around we hugged and kissed Pawpaw goodbye.  Tears flowed, but his smile was never fading.  He was ready.  He was ready. 

He went to be with the Lord, a place he forever longed to be, Sept. 11th around 1 a.m.  And our lives were changed.  Forever changed...

Saturday, September 8, 2012


Friday, September 7th, I went to pick up the kids from school.  My dad came to sit with Mammaw and I decided to take the babies with me because they were getting a little stir crazy!  Wow, we started an adventure without even knowing. 

We were stopped at a red light on 31 (right across the street from West Elementary).  I was thinking about how I was going to go to McDonalds and get me some fries and a LARGE sweet tea and sit in carpool line (bc I was a little early).  When there was a BAM!!!  It was the weirdest feeling ever!  I wish I could explain.  It was just like the crash test dummies.  I felt just like one of those.  I never saw the guy coming (which they say is good because I gave into the movement of the crash instead of bracing myself)and he had no idea we were stopped at a red light.  When I was hit it took a sec to realize that it was a wreck I was just in and at that point, I braced myself because I was going into the car in front of me and BAM...the airbag came out.  I do wish I could have seen it on video!  I'm sure now after the fact it would have been funny to see me trying to process it all.  It's funny how I immediately had no clue what was going and I also immediately wondered..."what was I just doing" , "did I cause this to happen".  Again, a very strange feeling because I never saw it coming.  The babies immediately started screaming and crying in fear.  But when I told them it was ok (through fear and tears myself) they sat in their seats quietly and waited.  The whole thing was about 45 minutes but I swear it felt like it was 15 minutes tops.  The police and EMTs were there immediately. 

I couldn't open my door or the other door on my side.  My airbag burned my hand a little and my neck was immediately sore.  And because I braced myself and pressed the brake trying not to hit the other car my calve muscle was REALLY sore as well.  But that was it.  I was so glad the kids were perfectly fine!  No soreness no complaints from them.  And to me I can deal with that pain, thanks to Dr. Gamble, who I love so much and took the time to see me on SATURDAY!!  I continued to thank the Lord that we were all "fine"...  It was a crazy traumatic turn of events...Because the airbag came out the car is totalled.  Now, we are looking for a new vehicle.  I thought it would be fun but actually it's a little nerve racking.  But HOPEFULLY we are at least going to lower our car payment by $100.  So that could be a little blessing in disguise. 

So thankful the Lord knows all the plans.  I'm just trusting him and looking for ways to learn from this experience. 

Scene of the crime...so shook up that I only took this picture...

This is the car in front of me...the damage I did!

the one who didn't see me...

My burn...Real dramatic, right?!?  Look real close.  HA!

THANK YOU SILENA...For coming to my rescue!!  Without you I may still be stranded...ha ha ha!


Tuesday, September 4, 2012

New Project...

My friend Brianna at church can sew and sews a lot of her daughters cute little ruffle pants (which are very expensive if bought) and skirts, she does purses...super talented.  She has convinced me that I could do it. 

She is a lot like me.  She doesn't know all the intricate details of sewing, the hows and whys (or cares for that matter) she can just do it.  That's how I roll with my photography.  I honestly don't know anything about cameras or software...I just play with it until it works for me,and it's by no means perfect but I get what I want.  So, she convinced me I could do it.  We went and bought fabric Saturday morning.  Which was so overwhelming but SO extremely fun!  We are making ruffle pants for Mary and a ruffle skirt for Anna and they both will have a brown t-shirt that we are sewing a ragged pumpkin on.  YOU WILL SEE FINAL PROJECT!!  TRUST ME! 

But Sunday afternoon we made these...

Our shirts come in Friday so we will get together again SOON!! CANNOT WAIT! And all I've thought about since then is sewing again!!  I found myself looking inside my pajama pants convincing myself I could make them.  I hope I get addicted to this!! I have plans of making Vivie and Francie matching outfits for all of them to get their pictures in!!  Fun times await!

While we were there...Brianna got down all Tyler's old Thomas the Train tracks and trains and the boy was in HEAVEN made a track clear across their living room and cried to the point I had to put him in the car to help clean up.  He was a BASKETCASE when we left.